"Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid."

Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order
of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter.
"You don't?" I replied.
"We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.
"So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?"
"That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.

The paragraph above doesn't amaze me because of what happened a couple of
months ago. I was checking out at the local Foodland with just a few items and the
lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those
"Dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so
they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
"Divider" looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar
code she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my
mind, I don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK" and I paid her for the things and
left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

MAKES YOU WONDER HOW THESE PEOPLE CAN SURVIVE!!!
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out
very quickly. When inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on
the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM
"thingy."

I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside hercar.
"Do you need some help?" I asked.
She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery
to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing
to a distant convenient store) would have a battery to fit this?"
"Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm too?" I asked.
"No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.
As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over
there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing
and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?"
"Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her
last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make
five "blank" copies.

I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was towed into the
garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing
generally looked like an extra in Twister."
I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the
"cruise control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.

IDIOTS & COMPUTERS...
My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank.
Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One
night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question:
"I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire
downtown?"

Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on
his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine.
The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy
button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.